Jeffrey Platts

Your Soulmate WANTS You To Be Single

Written by on February 1, 2010

A shift in perspective is a powerful thing.

Every now and then I’ll hear someone complain about being single. Usually a story about how they’re some kind of social pariah or less of a person because they’re still single while all their friends are getting married and popping out babies. I’ve heard it from both women and men. I’ve even heard it from myself.

The reality is that when you meet your future partner/soulmate/spouse, the fact that you ARE single will be something they absolutely LOVE about you.

Haven’t you ever met someone you think is so smart, fun, cute and sexy, but then you find out they’re already in a relationship?After some mild disappointment,you get over it and move on. Good news is that the Universe is telling you that there are potential partners out there for you that fit what you’re looking for and you’re getting closer.

Also, haven’t you been on the flip side? You’re in a relationship with or dating someone that you know you should have ended a long time ago. But you kept hanging on out of fear of being single and alone (oh no!). Then you meet someone really amazing, but you are currently in that relationship that you want to end anyways. So presuming none of you wants to be the adulterer or the mistress, you let things go. But had you followed your own intuition and ended your relationship a while back, you’d already be single and (presumably) emotionally ready for a new partner.

Of course, the Universe is abundant. So if any of the situations above happened to you, remember there are plenty of people out there that would make perfect partners for you. The idea of only “one” soulmate is b.s.

Complaining about being single is 1) annoying to listen to no matter who you are and 2) just keeps you in a negative/resistant vibration so your future partner is probably not going want to interact with you anyway (more likely is that your paths won’t even cross). So complaining about being single keeps you feeling bad while you’re single and keeps you single. Great strategy!

Some tips:

  1. If you or any of your friends start to complain about being single, tell them to shut the hell up. Ok, maybe just gently shift the conversation to a different topic. 🙂
  2. Know that you being single is an requirement in the whole equation. Single + Single = Two available people.
  3. Practice shifting your perspective on other topics as well. See how the experience or current reality you previously viewed as something bad, is actually an ASSET for you, a necessary part of the equation for what you want.

Jeffrey Platts is a men's coach and authentic communication expert who is passionate about helping men create amazing relationships with women. With over 20 years of personal study and transformational training, he has led nearly 200 workshops and retreats on personal growth, dating, and communication. Jeffrey's work and writing has been featured in the Huffington Post, Washington Post, ABC News, Authentic Man Program and the Good Men Project. He brings a rich toolbox of insights and experiences to his facilitation, integrating his adventures as DJ, amateur stand-up comedian, salsa dancer, yoga teacher and world traveler.